Friday, October 14, 2016

Annador

Huge green eyes snapped open; they were filled with fear. An eighteen-year-old girl lay on a dirt-streaked cement floor. Her coppery brown hair lay in a heap around her face as she stared at the ceiling of the bare room. A large bruise over her left eye clashed with her beautiful, olive complexion.

The room was silent, except for her ragged breathing, as her once beautiful dress rose and fell. Willow, the princess of Annador, now lay in a concrete cell in Ondalisia, with her mother, father, and brothers somewhere nearby by, waiting for what Willow was sure would be a death sentence. Willow glared at the ceiling as she thought of Daniel, the prince of Nurdion, whom she was supposed to marry, before her kingdom was taken and her family held captive god knows where.

Daniel was a tall, handsome boy with brownish, almost black hair, a chiseled face, and a darker shade of skin. Even though it was an arranged marriage, Willow had been excited. She had had a huge crush on him ever since she met him. Willow smiled at the memory.

Willow walked into the bedroom, along with a girl with beautiful red hair and freckles sprinkled over her nose. Laughing, Willow and Liana sat down on a neatly made bed, with soft blankets and fluffy pillows.  Smoothing their dresses, the girls continued to talk, laughing and smiling. They talked, until a loud thud resounded from Liana's closet.

"What was that?" Willow asked

"I don't know..." Liana mumbled, pushing her hair behind her ear. Willow stood from the bed, carefully smoothing creases from her beautiful, blue dress. It was short, so she could run, even though her mother disapproved of it. Willow had actually cut off the bottom of the silk dress and sewed the seams. She was so good with a needle, no one could tell that the dress hadn't been made that way. Walking to the closet door, Willow turned to face Liana, her hand on the closet's doorknob.

"May I?"  asked Willow. Frowning, Liana nodded. Willow smiled, and opened the closet door. A boy, about her age, maybe older stumbled out of the closet smiling. Willows eyes widened with shock, then smiled sheepishly. 
"Hi!" The boy said, smiling. "My name's Daniel."  

Smiling, Willow opened eyes to look at the concrete ceiling of her cell once again.

"Get up, girl." A rough voice jerked Willow back to reality. A huge hand jerked Willow up, sending shooting pains up her battered legs and arms. "Come on. It's time to meet the king."

11 comments:

Sara GC said...

Great use of detailed language here. I would love to know how old Willow was when she met Daniel, the day he tumbled out of the closet. Were they children, teens, or was it recent?

Anonymous said...

This is such I great story! Please right more. What does the king say to her? Does she die?

Anonymous said...

Very interesting. Great use of vocabulary.

Anonymous said...

I think this story was very well written with a lot of great grammar. Also, the way you described everything was wonderful. By doing that, I could easily picture everything in my head.

Anonymous said...

This post was so amazing! I love how you described what Willow was wearing and what Daniel looked like. My favorite part was the flash back because it showed more about Willow and her personal life. What gave you this idea? Like was there anything specific that inspired you?

Anonymous said...
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Anonymous said...

Oh my goodness this is wonderful! I am about to read the other chapters that are up currently. I really love what you're doing with this story and the vocabulary is simply superb!

Anonymous said...

I really liked how you wrote "olive complexion". It gave a really nice image of her. How did she get in trouble? I bet I will find out in the next one.

Anonymous said...

Wow, I'll have to read all the rest of these because of that great cliff hanger. Good job being descriptive, but not having too many adjectives.

Anonymous said...

Your use of detail is so great I felt like I was in the cell with willow. Also I love the word battered it made her bruises seem really bad.

Anonymous said...

I feel like I am Willow. I feel her pain and confusion through the series. I have only read the first four thoguh.

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